i want to walk down the streets not caring about the thousands of faces that i pass by/i want to swing my arms around/ jump up at random points and laugh like i've just seen the funniest joke ever/i want to act like an idiot in this endless phase of time where people always try to act smart/i want to do things my own way/using the method i'm most comfortable with/not caring about their opinions/just being concerned for myself and me only/i don't want to be controlled by any other person on earth/i want to stand alone on a hilltop/gazing down at the millions of lights coming from the earth's foolish inhabitants/seeing them get around slogging their guts out/all for a so-called comfortable life/i want to be a dime on a street/pick up a musical instrument and hope i'll become talented at it/go from street to street carrying my only means of survival with me/play whatever music i like to my hearts' content/it doesn't matter if it's not pleasing to their ears/they can laugh all they want/but i won't change my style just for them/ill look on the sea of faces with uncaring eyes and continue being a wanderer/going from district to district zone to zone/i'll find myself starving under the night sky/praying desperately for a hot bowl of udon/or just about anything that seems relatively edible/i'll not lose the chance to grab it/i'll find myself shivering when winter comes/with only a thin and tattered piece of excuse as a passable sweater to give me warmth or the lack of/i'll walk around among the many dark shadows finding the most deserted alleyway to spend my night/i'll chse the cats away and mark that spot as my temporary territory/i'll use the matches i've stolen earlier to strike up a decent fire/i'll place my hands over the blaze/not caring if i touch the flames/i'll sing a song of celebration/celebration for myself/celebration of the future that is yet to come/celebration of this carefree life that i lead/never once would i look back/never once would i find myself wondering 'what if'/i've taken on this route/it doesn't matter much now/regrets are reserved for idiots who can't make up their minds/i pride myself on being decisive/i'll forge on ahead knowing that i made the decision for myself only/not caring about others with others not caring about me/a lonely existence that may be/and most likely when i die no one would bother to bury my corpse/i would probably fade away under the hot sun/get treated like ordinary trash/maybe that's what i've always been right from the start/trash unworthy of this earth/trash which don't deserve a second glance/there would be no one there to mourn my death/along with the other wanderers of this earth/we would get ignored/no one pitying us and no one caring about us/but that's where the catch comes/who says we want to be pitied/who says we yearn for other human contact?/our existence is for ourselves only/the world spawned us they didn't follow through their actions/left us to fend for ourselves/to such a world i would much better be left alone to my own devices/they think they are superior/they think they're the best/they judge each other based on what they wear and how many certs they hold/im glad to be out of this vicious cycle/hypocrisy often finds themselves being passed down/from parents to children/i would have none of the problem/since i would love no one and no one would love me/after my walk on earth what comes of me next i wonder/whatever that is/i'm sure the people would not be of this sort/humans they would not be/perhaps they would be angels/perhaps i might even meet God Himself/i saw often when i passed by these little churches/those well-fed plump humans who sing to several octaves and let their voices be carried through the wind/is there really such a God i wonder/should i ever meet Him one day/i would most probably look up at him/for i think he would be rather tall and well-built/i would take a good look at him/especially His eyes for these are the only places where you can find people's most sincere feelings/i would tell Him what a world He has created/a world in which people kill off each other and fend only for themselves/a world where corruption takes its toll every single day/and a world which is too beatiful to house these lowly inhabitants called humans/i don't care about what his reaction would be/He would probably raise His big hand to smack me across the face for insulting His creation/i don't and would never care/this entire dimension of existence/i've lived and not found it's significance/i've lived and not found anything worthy to cling onto/i've been born having hope/but that hope was cruelly taken away from me/i've lived and lost/i've lived and still hasn't found the meaning to my existence/i've never left any imprints on people/even the places i've went to hold no evidences of me having been there/i've lived and yet not smiled/or rather i've not found any reason to smile/what do tommorow hold for me?/i'll never know/but ill live the way i've lived before/not caring/never complaining/just taking life's shits as they come along/sometimes succeeding sometimes failing/i'll never find the answers i've been looking for/and yet i would keep on searching/searching for that impossible holy grail/searching but not yielding fruits/that's the existence i'll lead/that's the life i've chosen/and i'll never have any regrets.